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Saturday, November 15, 2014

Life is not about making lemonade, it's about squeezing the shit out of the lemons

It's true. You can arrive at your destination, whether it's good or bad and tell people you love it, that this was what you meant the ENTIRE TIME you were working towards it, or you can admit the truth; the best part of the process was the journey. The destination is, in fact, not what you had hoped or planned for. My current journey has taken a turn. I find myself questioning my life and the choices that led me to my current situation.

I will say that to the outside world, I have a perfectly lovely, wonderful life. Married almost 15 years to a handsome guy, two smart, funny, beautiful kids. A house, good job, working on that career...a car to get around. The occasional night out with girlfriends. I post funny things on Facebook and people tell me they enjoy those little quotes from my kids or my somewhat skewed point of view about the world. One random compliment like that can make my entire day, so thanks to you all for that. 

But here's the truth. I'm not happy. I haven't been happy for a long time and now I've come to a crossroads. I have decisions to make. If only I could write like I want...if only I was anonymous, perhaps I would write down the entire truth