This Kid Makes Me Laugh

As I said before, I know that I'm biased, but how freakin' cute is that?

Ok, am I the only one who thinks it's totally awesome that someone in Italy signed my blog and actually reads it? Sadly, I checked out her blog and it's written (obviously) in Italian so I couldn't read it, but I did sign her guestbook, or leave a comment or whatever Blogger calls it.

I'm hungry.

Today I went to see my dad. He is a little weird. I once said to a Jewish boy that my dad looked like Moses and he said "Oh, he looks like a Jew, does he?" Which flustered me to no end. I was sixteen, had no idea that Moses was a Jew, no idea that Jews had a 'look' and I just knew I had made a faux pas, even if I wasn't exactly sure what it was yet. Any answer was sure to insult this guy and that wasn't my intent. I was horribly embarrassed (and truth be known, I still am, 13 years later) and I mumbled something about, "What? Um, no, I mean, uh, I didn't think Jews had a 'look'." I was trying to be PC, you know, What!? There is no difference between you and I, we are just the same, I see no difference, I am much too liberal to see a difference. And the guy was indeed insulted, and retorted, "Of course Jews have a 'look'!" He was scandalized. I honestly thought that Judaism was purely a religion and that anybody could be a Jew if they chose. I didn't think of them as a "people" or a "race" until I was a little older. My mother looked at me in horror when I told her the story and said, "Well, yes, it IS a religion and anyone can convert, I suppose, to Judaism, but they definitely started out as a seperate race. I mean, my God lovey, what do you THINK Moses meant when he said, 'Let my people go!'?" This conversation did nothing to relive my embarrassment. When I was five, my best friend was a Jew and I didn't think she looked any different than me. But I was five, so what do I know?

That story reminds me of another, when I was 17. I was taking summer school and I was telling my girlfriend a funny story about this guy I hung out with that summer. We were talking about food and he said he'd never eaten bacon before and I was astounded, I asked him what rock he'd been living under to never have eaten bacon. He laughed and said, "Peaches, I'm Muslim, I don't eat pork" and I was, again, embarrassed at my faux pas. Anyway, I was telling this girl in my class about it and I said, "I didn't even know he was Muslim, I mean, he doesn't LOOK Muslim!" And this girl behind me, she gets all mad and says, "Exactly what are Muslims supposed to look like?" and there I was again, totally embarrassed, I had just insulted this girl without even meaning to. And later that day I had another cringe-worthy conversation with my mother, "Well, lovey, of course she was mad, Muslims don't have to LOOK like anything, it's a religion, anyone can be a Muslim." Gee thanks for clearing that up. So there, I thought Judaism was just a religion and had nothing to do with race and that Muslims were a certain race of people and had nothing to do with religion.

And who do I have to blame for all this embarrassment and cringing?

I like to blame my Dad. My Dad is an Atheist and raised us as Atheists. He took it further though and often ridiculed organized religion and painted religious people like fanatics, which made us reluctant to explore religion. I have often lamented this because I'm so very ignorant about religion. I don't think being closed-minded about people's beliefs is any better than being a religious fanatic. It's just closed-minded in a different way. Most of what I know now is just stuff I've picked up from books and class and stuff, but I'd like to take a course on religion, just to learn about the different kinds.

Anyway, I did, at least, know who Moses was even if I never picked up on the fact that he was Jewish (how embarrassing when he's, like, the LEADER of the Jews). I even knew that he lead the Hebrews (Hebrews are Jews?) away from Egypt and across the Red Sea after he miraculously parted it. Which isn't red at all, by the way. I only know all this because my mom liked to watch the Ten Commandments at Easter time. And I always thought my dad looked like Moses. Now I realize that he just looks like Charleton Heston in a wig.

Anyway, my dad and I had a surprisingly nice visit. We went to the local park and walked around and then we sat on a bench near the water and talked about whether the geese would make a good meal. We decided they would. We also decided that everyone should slaughter a Canada Goose on Canada Day and eat it for dinner. Because there are about 80 million of them and only 30 million of us. We'd hardly make a dent in the population and our parks wouldn't be so covered in goose shit.

If you can't tell, my Dad smokes a lot of weed and I used to, so we have strange conversations. K fell asleep in her Snugli while we walked so she was happy too.

I still haven't smoked and it's getting easier, although not smoking makes me feel like I'm forgetting something all the time. Like, I'll clean the bathroom and usually I'd go out for a smoke after (to reward myself on a job well done), now I don't smoke, but I feel like I'm missing something, like the job isn't complete. The feeling eventually goes away.