Embarrassingly Clumsy

I went to Ikea with Tara yesterday and before we started shopping, we fed ourselves and the babies. The restaurant at the Burlington Ikea is pretty good and they provide microwaves for any baby food you might bring. Kind of refreshing that they don't insist that you eat their food. Anyway, after we were all done eating, I put our trays on the tray rack. Then Tara thought maybe she left her tubberware lid on the tray, so I went to look, but couldn't find it. She couldn't find it either, so I thought I would double check the tray. I pulled the tray out from the rack about halfway and then used both hands to start searching through the dishes and napkins on the tray. Unfortunately, no sooner had I let go of the tray then it came crashing down to the floor, spilling uneaten food and breaking dishes with a resounding *CRASH* I was so embarrassed, I started cleaning up the mess, hoping no one would notice. Considering there was salad, apple sauce, meatballs and mac and cheese mixed in with the broken dishes on the floor and the whole mess had somehow spread out about three feet in every direction, trying to hide it was futile, but I tried anyway. While I was thinking this, I picked up a piece of broken dish by the sharp edge and cut my finger. It wasn't much worse than a paper cut, but it was bleeding a lot more. This is when the Ikea employee came out and said, "Oh, don't worry about cleaning that up, we can do, it's our job" and I said, "OK, is there a place I can wash my hands? And I need a bandaid, I have a little cut" "OH, well, you need to come with me and talk to a manager, you'll have to fill out an incident report" Ah crap!!! So I followed the Ikea person over to the cashier, where, apparently, there was a manager. I went with her to the sink, but not before two customers saw my bleeding finger and made sympathetic but disgusted face at me. The manager had me wash my hands and swab the cut with alcohol (OUCH). The whole time this was happening, Tara was with the babies and she was probably wondering where the hell I was, because I went to check for her lid and then I disappeared! So I told the manager I would be right back, I had to tell my friend what had happen. The manager said that was fine, that Rob was coming up to fill in an incident report. Greaaaaaat! So we were standing there and the manager comes over and gives me a bandaid and then this guy comes up and says he's Rob and I told him that my finger was fine, that is was a tiny cut, no more than a paper cut, really, so he was like, "So you don't want to fill out a report?" And I was, "Um, if I don't have to, than no." So we were free to go. I had a bloody papertowel to throw out and Tara had a paper towel and a glass so I took them for her and since I didn't want to leave the glass on the counter, I put it on a tray that was on the dreaded tray rack. Only the floor was all slippery from my now mopped mess and my left foot slipped forward and I went down hard to ground on my right knee. I'm not kidding, I have a bruise today to prove it! I stood back up so quickly, I don't even think anyone noticed. At least, I'm really hoping no one noticed. I rushed over to Tara and said, "We have to leave, now. I just fell in the wet spot created by my mess and I don't want to have to fill out an incident report!" Tara started laughing at me and said, "Really, what happened, did you really fall? Are you ok?" And then, THEN, when I got home last night and I was putting stuff away and cleaning out my closet (I got a shoe holder and now my closet is all orgnaized) I fell down the stairs holding the baby and three bags of used clothes. I only fell down the three stairs leading to the landing, but I hurt my bum and my lower back. At least there wasn't a cafeteria full of people staring at me as I went down this time. I'm hoping that I spent all my clumsy tokens yesterday and that I have a accident-free Tuesday.
Oh, and the lid, the one that Tara couldn't find and thought was on the tray? She suddenly remembered that she left it over near the microwaves and then forgot to get it before we left the restaurant anyway!!! For all we know, that lid is still on the counter waiting for someone to claim it!